Don’t Assume

No, I did NOT fall again. Never left my feet, no damage done, no gym equipment revenge needing to be plotted.

However, while doing one of my quick laps around the sidewalk in the back yard, in the dark, I found that one of the local orb weavers had unexpectedly built a large web straight across the path at face heighth. The subsequent “spider web dance” and convulsions were apparently generating enough centrifugal energy and G-forces on my wrist as I swung my arms around to set off the alarm. So, again, I got to stop mid-crisis and tell my watch to chill, I was not in need of a 9-1-1 call. I was dealing with a garden spider, not Shelob. (I was busy re-inventing break dancing perhaps, but I’m no Samwise Gamgee.)

I’m going to have to start carrying a flashlight. Or I will break something. With my luck I would break something badly, die, end up at the Pearly Gates, tell St. Peter what happened, and while laughing riotously they would send me to Hell “just because!”