I Had A Thought, But

I distinctly remember earlier today having a cool thought for some topic or subject to write about. I remember thinking, “Yeah, that would be a good one for later on today!”

But now it’s time to write and I haven’t a clue what it was.

There are days when I worry about losing my memory due to some disease or simply because I’m getting older. Someone knowledgeable that I mentioned this to told me not to worry, it’s just a matter of being mildly absent minded, not Alzheimer’s.

Maybe. I’ve always been terrible with names. I’ve had to just get used to the embarrassment of asking for the name of someone who I’ve met several times and really should know. Somehow “I’d like you to meet that guy from the hangar who works on the Fairchild and drives the cool old Corvette” isn’t quite up to snuff when you’re trying to make proper introductions.

One of the saddest stories (and movie) that I’ve ever read was “Flowers For Algernon” by Daniel Keyes. (“Charly” with Cliff Robertson winning the Academy Award for Best Actor for movie fans.) For Charlie Gordon to know what’s happening to himself at the end but be unable to stop it is terrible. Even more so is the way, once all is said and done, that he doesn’t remember and doesn’t care – but all of the people who love him do.

There’s a tough one for you – if you have no choice but to lose your memories and personality, would you rather not know about it (or care) or would you rather know and somewhere still be “you,” even if “you” was trapped and unable to let anyone know?

I guess in a nutshell, there’s “Flowers For Algernon” versus “Locked In” by John Scalzi.

I think I would go with the latter, “Locked In” premise. It’s that whole, stupid, core kernel of eternal optimism that I can’t seem to beat into submission, but if you’re still “you” in some say, maybe you can figure something out or something will change to where things get better.

Stupid core kernel of eternal optimism!

And what’s up with this whole “deja vu” thing? I don’t experience it often, but it hit earlier today and was just spooky.

Or maybe I just thought that I had a good idea for today’s post, but it was really the “front end” of a deja vu experience and some day I’ll get to the “back end” and remember what the idea was. Sort of like it pops into the future through a wormhole in the space-time continuum that goes through my brain.

I hope it wasn’t important.