Lizard Diet Conundrum

As you all remember since you’ve been following this deluge of daily diatribes, Monsieur Badass (a partially crippled Western fence lizard) hangs out under the Volvo when it’s parked in the driveway. Aside from the protection from birds and other predators, I also suspect that he hides there because there are ants to eat.

It’s also been hotter than Hell here in Southern California, and one side effect is a sharp increase in the number of black widow spider webs around the yard. Including one that keeps rebuilding under the Volvo, very near where Monsieur Badass hangs out. Now, I’m really not a fan of arachnids of any kind, but I’m really, REALLY opposed to the venomous arachnids. My first immediate reaction is to shriek and run away, but my second, more thoughtful, more mature and considered reaction is to rain nuclear fire on them (preferably from orbit). Or at the very least, soak the area in insecticide.

But doing that stands a good chance of also poisoning Monsieur Badass, which would be very bad.

Then on a hunch I checked out what Western fence lizards eat in the wild. There are ants, crickets, other small bugs and spiders…including black widow spiders.

As a result, I’m not going to scream, nor nuke, nor soak the web and car in poison. I’ll leave the widder spidder’s web there for now, on the off chance that it’s another food source for Monsieur Badass.

The things we do for our friends and pets… 🥴