DIY Knee Surgery

I don’t think Rube Goldberg knew what he was starting.

1. Start with a long day at work for The Long Suffering Wife

2. This leads to a strong desire to not cook dinner

3. Add a desire for Chinese food

4. Make call for delivery

5. Settle back to relax while waiting

6. Allow cat to sit on my lap, as she does

7. Allow dog to sit on floor in front of The Long Suffering Wife, as she does

8. Wait forty-five minutes

9. Have delivery guy ring the doorbell

10. Have dog go absolutely bananas because SOMEBODY RANG THE DOORBELL, as she does

11. Have cat successfully recognize dog’s barking as the proper launch authorization code for an immediate departure for Low Earth Orbit

12. Launch cat from the preferred position (my lap)

13. Apply tourniquet to my bleeding leg

14. Apologize to everyone for putting a picture of my leg on the internet