I heard about this on the morning news as we were getting up this morning – figured it had to be a hoax. Apparently it’s not.
Are you freakin’ kidding me?
Okay, if you run into Paul McCartney in a completely out of context time and space, say, in the frozen food section of Ralph’s on Sunday morning when you want nothing more than to get your bag of Tater Tots and get home to watch the football game, I can see that you might say to yourself, “Wait, that guy looked familiar! Was he…” But by then Sir Paul is off into the organic vegetables and your Tater Tots are rapidly thawing and you never really know, but you’ll always wonder.
If you’re the bouncer at a top-notch, über-trendy nightclub on a Wednesday night in January in San Francisco or Dallas and some dude comes up and wants in, claiming to be Paul McCartney, your job is to be skeptical. Maybe this guy’s just a really, really good Paul McCartney impersonator! You’ll lose your job if you let him in and he’s a fake! In short, it sucks to be you, but maybe you could have him sing a bar or two of “Yesterday” or “Eleanor Rigby.” If it sounds like him, let him in! If it’s really him and your boss fires you anyway, then your boss is an asshole, you need to find a better job anyway, and you got a personal concert from a freakin’ legend! If it’s not him and you get fired, then you probably weren’t cut out to be a bouncer and you should go find a job as a politician, where good judgement is not only not called for but is often a career killer.
On the other hand, let’s get real! You’re the bouncer at a top-notch, über-trendy nightclub on Grammy Night in February just blocks from where the Grammy ceremonies were just held. Inside the nightclub are a zillion heavy duty music industry icons, hosted by folks who just performed on stage at the Grammy Awards. Some guy who looks exactly like Paul McCartney, sounds exactly like Paul McCartney, and claims to be Paul McCartney comes up and you turn him away?! Not just once but twice, because you want to prove to the world that you’re consistently clueless?
Are You Freakin’ Kidding Me?
The excuse I’ve heard is that he was young and didn’t know who Paul McCartney was or what he looked like.
Too young? Oh, so they had a one-year-old working as a bouncer?
He didn’t know who Paul McCartney was or what he looked like? Then why in hell was he working as a bouncer at a post-Grammy Awards party?!
It boggles the mind, and new questions arise from the boggling process.
Would he have let Taylor Swift in? Beyoncé? Kanye West? Would he have known and recognized any of them?
Would he have let Paul McCartney in if he was with Taylor Swift, or Beyoncé, or Kanye West? (Note that the more sane, and mature, among us would refer to it as Taylor or Beyoncé or Kanye with Sir Paul, not the other way around.)
Would he have let Paul McCartney in if he was with John Lennon? And would he even understand why that’s a rhetorical and silly question made solely for the point of satire and exaggeration?
Kids these days!