Ping Pong Balls

Pop quiz time!

You’re in Los Angeles. Maybe you live here, maybe you’re visiting. It’s not relevant.

You need ping pong balls. Not 27,000 of them like for that Mythbusters episode, but maybe a six-pack.

You need them now. You don’t have time to go find a sporting goods store that’s open, or order them from Amazon, even if they do get delivered in an hour by an Amazon drone. (OK, scratch that, if you can get a six-pack of ping-pong balls delivered in an hour by a flying drone, then screw the pop quiz and go do it!)

You go into one of the large, upscale Los Angeles chain grocery stores. Not Bristol Farms or Gelsons upscale, but better than your average neighborhood Ralph’s or Vons. (Okay, it was a Pavilions.)

Where do you go in the store to find the ping pong balls?

Think about it.

Toys? You have a “toys” aisle, or even a toys section in your grocery store? BZZZZ! Wrong answer, and by the way, you’re in a Bristol Farms or a Gelsons. Or maybe you’re really lost and you’ve stumbled into a Rite-Aid with a milk & bread & candy & canned soup & pet food aisle and you think it’s a grocery store.

Ok, then that tiny section where they have like cheap pliers and screwdrivers and miscellaneous bolts and screws for a hundred times what you would pay at a hardware store? Wrong.

I guarantee that they’ve got them. Where, oh where, would they put them?







It’s like a really weird version of Supermarket Sweepstakes.

And the answer is…

Of course! In the frozen food aisle! Over with the frozen chicken patties, TV dinners, frozen, gluten free Jimmy Dean Delights Breakfast Bowls!

Welcome to Los Angeles! Now go get your head tattooed to look like stubble!

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