Category Archives: Flying

Flash Fiction: Center Seat, Coach Class

This week’s Flash Fiction Challenge is to write 1,000 words or so about “bad parents”. After pondering for a while, I decided that parents who use their kids as pawns and weapons in a contentious divorce are really, really bad parents.

As always, comments and constructive criticisms are appreciated.

CENTER SEAT, COACH CLASS

I had already gotten comfortable, my tablet in the seat back pocket along with two candy bars and my point-and-shoot camera. I had a blanket ready to go when they turned the air conditioning down to “subarctic”. I had cleaned the window so when I took picture the camera wouldn’t be trying to focus through multiple layers of forehead sweat residue. My headphones were in, my favorite songs playlist queued up on my phone. Hawaii, here I come!

The aisle seat had been filled with a Hispanic woman who seemed terribly out of place. Some combination of kids and in-laws and grandkids were filling two full rows back near the galley, but Grand Maw-maw had been deposited and strapped in up here ahead of the wing exits. She showed no sign she was going to do anything other than glower and whimper for the next ten hours.

I was just daring to hope the center seat would stay empty when a flight attendant escorted a small girl down the aisle. I would have guessed the girl was nine or ten. As she was buckled in, I noticed the absence of the usual ID lanyard which unaccompanied children usually wore. Odd.

As the final passengers were trying to find room in the overhead bins for their excess baggage I looked at the little girl and said, “Excuse me, would you want to switch seats with me so you can look out the window?”

She looked up at me with a quizzical look. For an instant I thought she might not speak English but she said, “No, thank you, sir. I fly a lot and I don’t care about looking out the window anymore.”

I swallowed my comments about how one should never get tired of looking out of the window when flying. Instead I nodded and said, “All right. Let me know if you change your mind later. It’s a long flight.”

“Ten hours and ten minutes, just like always.”

How did a ten-year-old get so world-weary and blasé?

Once in the air we settled in with our distractions and waited for the beverage service. As the carts started to roam the aisles I noticed the girl had put away her game and was holding her stomach, looking pale. I was going to mention something to one of the flight crew, but when they got to our aisle, the girl spoke up herself.

“Mommy, I’m not feeling very good.”

Mommy? The flight attendant in question was the same one who had brought her onto the plane and buckled her in. Leaning over the old woman in the aisle seat, she gave a brief, cursory exam and started asking questions.

“What’s wrong, what do you mean you don’t feel good?”

“My stomach hurts.”

“Is it a sharp pain, like when your appendix was sore, or are you nauseous?”

“Like I’m going to throw up.”

“When did this start? Did you play with any kids who were sick last week?”

“No. It just started feeling bad a little while ago, after we took off.”

“What did you –“

Before she could finish, the girl convulsed and vomited all over herself, the seats, me, and the Hispanic woman.

Chaos was the order of the day for the next ten minutes. I tried to not use too many inappropriate words in front of the girl and her mother. The Hispanic woman wasn’t so restrained but it was all in Spanish and neither the flight attendant nor her daughter seemed to understand a word.

Towels and napkins were distributed and air freshener was sprayed. The Hispanic woman was the least affected of us, so after a brief cleanup she was led to near seat even further away from the rest of her family, but away from the toxic waste zone. The young girl and I took a bit more work to clean. It took an effort to hold down my own gag reflex, but finally both the girl and I were wiped down. I took over one of the bathrooms to get minimally presentable.

I rinsed my shirt and pants thoroughly before trying to dry them as much as possible before going back out. I figuring that wet was better than chunder covered. When I went back out into the galley, the young girl was in the final stages of cleaning, her mother having found a change of clothes for her.

“You ate breakfast? Why did you eat if you were feeling bad?” her mother asked harshly.

“I didn’t feel bad then. I felt good. Daddy said I needed to eat hearty for the long trip, so we went to that deli I like.”

“What did you have for breakfast that might have made you sick?”

“Nothing, it all was good. I had pancakes and eggs and sausages and bagels with cream cheese and a pastrami sandwich. Then, because I ate all gone, Daddy said I should have one of the giant banana splits. Daddy bet me five dollars I couldn’t finish it. I won! Do you want to see the five dollars?”

The flight attendant was turning red. The other crewmembers helping her were suddenly finding something else to do or somewhere else to be.

“So, Daddy fed you all of that food and all of that ice cream just before you got on the plane?”

“Yes, but I feel much better now. Can I get my video game back?”

Her mother wasn’t listening. As she finished dressing her daughter, small chunks of her internal dialogue kept slipping quietly out. “That lousy son of a bitch! I’m going to take his ass… To use our daughter to embarrass me like this…”

She finally noticed I had come out of the bathroom. Flustered, she did her best to transition to professional flight attendant instead of furious mother. “I’m so sorry about this, sir; I’ve found you a different seat for the rest of the flight. I’ll help move your belongings.”

The voice was level and polite and the smile was firmly attached, but the eyes betrayed her. Mr. Sonofabitch Daddy might have made a tactical error in this child custody case.

I and my collateral damage clothes were on her side. I hoped she ripped him a new one.

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Filed under Flying, Science Fiction, Travel, Writing

Damn Inconsiderate Muse

She shows up in time for the deadline, but then it leaves me three minutes to write and post something here.

What would you like a picture of? How about this? A really cool bizjet landing at Camarillo.

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Wouldn’t it be neat to have one of those houses on the far hillside and just sit out there all day watching the planes?

 

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Contrails At Sunset

We’ve finally got a change in the weather coming in, an expected forty degree (F) drop between last Wednesday and next Wednesday. There’s a cut-off low headed down the coast from the northwest to bring us this change. At its forefront at sunset tonight there were layers of high, wispy, icy clouds.

With all of the fires south of here, which are fortunately dying down and getting under control with the cooler weather and calmer winds, there are health warnings all over SoCal about air quality hazards. One of the few good things from these fires is that we can get some spectacular sunsets, caused by the smoke and particulates in the atmosphere.

Between the wispy clouds and the smoke, I was hoping for a spectacular sunset.

Didn’t happen.

The smoke is generally blowing out to sea to the west of San Diego, while from our house we’re watching the sun set way over Ventura and Santa Barbara, 200 miles to the north of where the bulk of the smoke is. So, no joy on the pinks and oranges and reds. I hope the folks in Sandy Ago got a colorful sunset, even if I didn’t.

But while I was waiting, I could see that conditions above 30,000 feet must have been cold and calm, perfect for the formation of contrails from jets at cruising altitude. That part of the sky is a regular jetway for the jumbo jets heading from the Pacific Northwest down to Mexico and South America.

Several contrails looked hours old, having spread out quite a bit, but still keeping their straight line forms, almost parallel but not quite. Others were much thinner, just ten or fifteen minutes old. And like beads on a string, separated by five minutes and fifty miles or so, jets just passing by now were drawing new, razor sharp lines. All on a background of lacy, wispy swirls of clouds in a darkening sky.

It was lovely.

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Filed under Flying, Los Angeles, Photography, Weather

Not Quite A Vapor Cone

For lack of anything better to discuss today (or two brain cells to rub together in order to ignite a creative spark), let’s look at a simple but graphic demonstration of atmospheric condensation in an aircraft wake.

From the April 1, 2007 airshow at Point Magu in Ventura County, here’s an F-22 fighter doing a high speed pass (probably something in excess of 500 mph) about 50 feet off of the deck.

IMG_8413_smallAfterburners lit, he’s really moving. You can see the elevators on the tail just starting to tip up, which will lower the tail and tip up the nose. Then, 0.37 seconds later (the Canon XTi shoots at 2.7 frames per second in burst mode):

IMG_8414_smallThe plane is surrounded by fog of its own creation. From the smooth, streamlined airflow in the first picture, the airflow is now totally chaotic with a huge low-pressure area building up behind the plane as the airflow is disrupted. The air was cool and moist (we were only a quarter-mile or so from the beach), the pressure dropped dramatically in a fraction of a second, the air at lower pressure couldn’t contain nearly as much moisture, so the “extra” moisture gets squeezed out into microscopic droplets which we see as fog.

The pilot, on the other hand, is pulling about 9 G’s and transitioning from straight horizontal flight to straight up vertical flight — this is what is know in the vernacular as an “E-Ticket”!

Note that while similar in cause, this is not quite the same as a Mach 1 “vapor cone“. The vapor cone is also caused by a sudden change in air pressure, but the change is caused by the shock wave coming off of the plane (or rocket) as it passes through the sound barrier. Because that shock wave is conical in shape, the vapor cone is as well.

I haven’t seen a vapor cone personally — they don’t go supersonic at air shows very often, and when they do they’re usually at 40,000 feet (or more) and over the desert. But there are some fantastic pictures and video out there.

Maybe someday I’ll see one. In the meantime, you can see the effect shown by this F-22 at an airshow near you. In addition, now that our governmental “leaders” aren’t shutting down the government this year, the service demonstration teams (Navy Blue Angels, Air Force Thunderbirds, Army Golden Knights) are all flying a full airshow circuit this spring, summer, and fall. There are several good websites for keeping track of where airshows in your area are and who’s going to be there — here‘s my favorite.

Don’t forget your sunblock and stay hydrated! Most importantly, when you’re taking your thousands of pictures, remember to occasionally just watch, marvel, and enjoy. And keep an eye out for the sneak pass.

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Filed under Airshows, Flying, Photography

A Gathering Of Fighters (Video)

At the Southern California CAF today we had a memorial service for two of our long-time members. At the end of the service we had a couple of flybys, first by four SNJs (two of ours, two from the Condor Squadron out of Van Nuys), then by four of our fighters.

I was an idiot and didn’t bring any of my good cameras (um, yeah, maybe that is a sign…) but I did have my point & shoot camera and my iPhone. Maybe I’m not completely brain dead. Yet.

This 2:27 video clip follows the landing of the fighters as they’re taxiing back to our hanger. First is the P-51, next the F8F Bearcat, followed by the Spitfire, with the F6F Hellcat parking last. On the ramp in the background you can also see our C-46 “China Doll” parked alongside a Grumman HU-16 Albatross (which is not a CAF plane). Between “China Doll” and the hanger you can occasionally glimpse our PT-19.

Viewing suggestion — full screen, turned up LOUD. But maybe that’s just me.

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Filed under CAF, Flying

Sunset, With Contrails

Brought to the planet Earth especially for you by the laws of physics, I present a beautiful sunset!

The diffraction of light though the atmosphere as we pass the terminator into darkness had caused the short blue wavelengths to all be filtered out, leaving only a zillion shades of red, pink, peach, crimson, raspberry, scarlet, violet, rose, burgundy, vermilion, carmine, ruby, rust, redwood, cardinal, and maroon.

The condensation of some water vapor in the atmosphere about six miles above the surface of the planet has given us a nice white background to be tinted by all of those colors, fluffy, puffy, airy, billowy, ripply, and swirling.

Behind it the blue sky fades to shades of ultramarine, navy, cobalt, midnight, and periwinkle, followed by shades of heliotrope, mulberry, purpureus, slate, onyx, gray, grey, ebony, charcoal, jet, and black.

Across this palette like a knife streak two man-made wonders of titanium, aluminum, carbon fiber, and Jet-A, leaving behind them arrow-straight tails of expanding and dissipating water vapor condensation.

Natural and man-made clouds, they act together to allow us to see all of the colors the Sun, Earth, and atmosphere have contrived to briefly project through the air.

Has it ever occurred to you that if there aren’t any clouds at sunset, if the sky is crystal clear, all of those colors are there, but they’re just passing unseen off into space, lost forever because they had nothing to reflect off of?

photo 1And before you ask…

photo 3NO, I haven’t had a thing to drink, smoke, or otherwise indulge in. It’s just some cosmic thinking, no doubt brought about by that really excellent television show on Fox that just finished.

Out of sight, man!

 

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Airlines Bingo

Has anyone ever played “Boring Meeting Bingo,” aka “Dogma Bingo,” aka “Bullshit Bingo?” You know, where you fill a typical 5×5 bingo card with phrases or event or mannerisms or memes, then see who can fill their card first with the observed phenomenon or catchphrase?

On the way from BUR to MAV via LAS last week I was Tweeting my game progress across the country in my made-up version of this, “Airlines Bingo”:

Today, my meetings in Midland over, it was time to go home by the same route in reverse:

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Filed under Farce, Flying, Travel

BUR To MAF

Today I flew from the Los Angeles area to Midland-Odessa, Texas for the Annual CAF Staff Meeting which starts tomorrow.

photo 01This was “Plan A” – I was going to fly out in the private plane of our Wing Leader. Something came up at the last minute, so…

20140226-232432.jpgThis was “Plan C.” (“Plan B” was to drive out, but common sense reared its ugly head.)

20140226-233529.jpgHoover Dam and that freakishly huge bridge over the gorge there where the Colorado River is dammed.

20140226-233654.jpgBehnd the dam is Lake Mead, with a very fractal-ly edge. Slartybardfast would have been proud.

20140226-233712.jpgI have to track down what airport this is, right next to a really neat canyon.

20140226-233804.jpgThe desert has a zillion different colors and shades and mesas and buttes and escarpments.

20140226-233908.jpgRivers give water and water means life out here.

20140226-233926.jpgSome of the salt beds stand out quite a bit, as in, “See it from space with the naked eye” standing out.

20140226-233942.jpgNear midland, there are mile upon mile upon mile upon mile upon mile of Grade A flatness with oil wells about every hundred yards as far as the eye can see.

Told you I would be taking a lot of pictures!

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Filed under CAF, Flying, Photography, Travel

Chaotic Travel On The Horizon

I’m one of those folks who likes to have travel plans pre-arranged at least to some extent. Airline reservations are a must, always done at least seven days in advance (fourteen is better) in order to get the best rates and selections. Hotel reservations in place, unless I’m driving cross-country, in which case I’ll at least have an idea of how far I want to go and where I should be looking for a Motel Six or Holiday Inn.

I understand that things happen, so if that flight gets delayed or cancelled, you have to adjust. That can be annoying and frustrating, but you deal with it as best you can and keep your options open. But before you even start the trip — that’s when I like to at least have an initial battle plan.

I found out a couple of weeks ago that I was going to Texas for the annual CAF National Staff Meeting. I’m supposed to be there tomorrow night for the conference to start on Thursday.

The plans I had when I got up this morning got scrapped around 10:30, at which point “Plan B” was history by 11:00, and we’re on to “Plan C”. I think I’ve got it now, but there were moments when I contemplated “Plan D”, which was to simply not go and cut my losses. Time will tell if that would have been the best choice.

Anyway, I need to be at Burbank earlier than I usually wake up and I still need to pack and I’m trying to think all of the things that I’ve forgotten and at least on Plans B & C I don’t have to worry about minimizing my luggage but I was really looking forward to the adventure and learning experience of Plan A but now it’s time to make Plan C work and at least I think I’ve gotten all of my digital and electronic minions primed and ready to go here while I’m gone and The Long-Suffering Wife is doing well after her surgery so I shouldn’t have to worry about her and I really hope that I can get back Sunday night in time for the Academy Awards show but in the meantime I’m planning on meeting lots of people and having a great time in Midland-Odessa.

Oh, I guess I need to get some sleep, also.  See ya’!

(Guess what — I’ll probably be taking lots of pictures along the way…)

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Filed under CAF, Flying, Travel

What A Really Long Day, What A Beautiful Sunset!

It was a long day out at Camarillo Airport, but at the end of the day there was the most marvelous pink, puffy sunset.

photo 1To the east, a cotton candy sky over the CAF’s C-46, “China Doll”

photo 2To the west, a couple of our aircraft under restoration as the sun sets. I particularly love the dark purple shadow stretching back from the clouds at the upper center.

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Filed under CAF, Flying, Photography, Weather