No – But I Wish

 

No, the keyboard and world don’t quite look like this – but I wish that I had some of the “good” painkillers so that it did.

I don’t, and my jaw/tooth is plenty sore enough to be annoying as hell. But none of the good stuff, just Extra Strength Excedrin every six hours.

No dentist today, or tomorrow – the earliest I can get in is at the end of the day on Wednesday, and I’m expecting to be told that I need to go to the endodontist at that point, and who knows how long that will take. (Buy stock in GSK Healthcare!)

The audit kicked off today and I spent a full day (and then some) dealing with it through the fog of “significant discomfort.” Almost more fun than any human being should be allowed to have with their clothes on.

Almost.

Yes, I did take yesterday’s picture by sticking my entire iPhone 13 Max Pro in my mouth and then taking pictures. Isn’t that how everyone does it?

Where does that go on my resume? Skills? Life Experiences? Talent?

I’ll be fine. I just reserve the right to be cranky.

Crankier.

Whatever.

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Filed under Art, Health, Paul

Which God’s Dog Did I Kick

Work deadlines, forever home house hunting, starting to pack for the move, filling out mortgage application paperwork, the news, the world, the Mango Mussolini & his cult, skunks, gophers… It is enough to get on your last nerve and dance on it a bit.

And when you finally think that maybe, perhaps, against all odds, you might be keeping your nose above water, the Universe says, “Yeah, right! It’s cute that you think that!”

I’m trying to keep it in the proper perspective. It’s not cancer. I wasn’t hit by a car. The Long-Suffering Wife and my kids are all fine. But, on the other hand – JEEZ LOUISE!!

Those of you who have been reading a while will remember that last summer was a freakin’ festival of fun in a dental sense, with three root canals and all of the accompanying crowns and fillings and EXPENSE and *PAIN*!

Eating breakfast this morning I felt the “pop!” and the “crack!” (no “snap,” but I might have missed that in all of the excitement of the moment) and sure enough, there’s a huge chunk of tooth that’s gone walkabout.

I’m not in absolute agony, thankfully, but it’s tender and sore and I’m going to assume that absolute agony is in the on-deck circle just waiting for it’s turn at bat any moment, so as busy as this week already was going to be, I’m going to need to figure out how to squeeze in at least one and probably a couple of dental appointments.

Using a phrase I think I learned from the esteemed Jim Wright online (“Stonekettle”), “Which god’s dog did I kick? And how do I apologize?”

This too shall pass. But then again, they say that about kidney stones, and I’ve had them a number of times and I never want to have them again. Just like major dental work.

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Filed under Health, Paul, Photography

22:58 Skunk

It’s almost 11:00 PM, the tunes (Sirius-XM Channel 33’s “Saturday Night Safety Dance” show) are hot and loud, the day has been exhausting (again)… and somewhere very nearby, like, eye-wateringly strong type close, there’s a very pissed off and frightened skunk.

DUDE!

I understand, I agree, I sympathize, but how is this helping?

Let’s work together. What do skunks eat? What’s your finest cuisine?

There’s a 50-pound bag of it and more to come if you can start killing or driving out gophers. You scratch my back…

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Filed under Critters, Farce

Pudding Brain

As Senior Director of Finance & Administration I often have a very full plate. To say the least. At the top of the annual list, especially in terms of stress and “challenges,” is the audit. Our auditors are good and generally nice folks who I get along with, but to be done properly the audit process by its very nature is … “thorough.” Think of it as being a bit like a colonoscopy without benefit of anesthesia, but everyone’s smiling and cooperative.

This year’s audit starts on Monday, so the last two weeks have been prep, prep, and more prep. Pulling documents, finalizing the year-end accounting, and so on. Tons and tons and tons of details, numbers, schedules, reports, and extra brownie points if the figures are actually accurate. (We do pretty well on that score, actually.)

But it does leave one with a bit of a “pudding brain.” Remember that classic of camp cinema, “Flash Gordon!,” the one with Sam J. Jones, Melody Anderson, Max von Sydow, Brian Blessed, Topol, and Timothy Dalton? (An excellent film!) Remember the “scanners” working the consoles in the bowels of the war rooms of Ming the Merciless?

That’s me already… I’ve even got the haircut for it. (I have GOT to find me a pair of those glasses!)


However, I’m not so fried that I didn’t notice the date. Yes, 81 years ago our parents and grandparents and great grandparents stormed the beaches of Normandy. That’s important to remember. But more important personally, it was 25 years ago tonight that I went out on a first date with The Long-Suffering Wife. She says that her fear was that I would excuse myself to the restroom and then slip out the window and shimmy a couple stories down a drain pipe to abandon her there.

Obviously, I didn’t.

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Filed under Entertainment, Family, Farce, Paul, Ronnie, Science Fiction, Silly Shit

Fine Feathered Friends – June 5th

The male house finches are in all of their red-feathered splendor, trying to attract a mate.

Whatever works!

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Filed under Birds, Photography

Contempt & Bemusement

Wednesday after work is my gym night with my trainer. He’s doing an excellent job of seeing just how far he can push me every week without actually breaking me. After almost a year in a small, private gym, today was our first day at a much larger, much newer gym nearby.

The old gym was small, and rarely had more than four or six other people there at the same time. (Usually in pairs, a client and a trainer.) Almost everyone was thus involved and minding their own business, either counting painful reps or performing them.

The new gym is much larger (not as large as a 24 Fitness or something like that), at least three or four times the size. It also had maybe a dozen pairs of client/trainers working out. No worries.

But about a quarter of the space is a bit partitioned off (-ish!) and was used for karate classes for grade school kids. They were making a ton of noise, as pre-teens kicking pads will do. No worries.

My favorite part was the holding pen for the moms and nannies. An open air waiting room of sorts for those who had brought their tykes and were simply killing time, waiting for them to sweat and scream so they could go home in a half hour.

When I say “moms and nannies,” I’m being exact. There were no dads. There were very obviously nannies and housekeepers, whose duties included getting the small ones to karate practice and back safely, along with all of the other cooking, cleaning, and domesstic work around the McMansion. This was an EXTREMELY Woodland Hills crowd, every car in the parking lot an SUV from either BWM, Mercedes, Lexus, Land Rover, Jaguar, or Tesla. My decades old Volvo convertible was definitely the poor man’s vehicle of the collection.

In the holding pen were three types of women:

The nannies, bored to tears, watching something or the other on their phones.

The business moms, on their Mac laptops, answering emails or writing legal briefs in their $5,000 Armani pantsuits.

The adult Valley Girls, makeup and hair perfect, figures toned and sculpted, every molecule of Botox in place, chatting for social karma points like their lives depended on it.

There were several times when I made eye contact with a member of this third group. I never spoke to any of them, but every time I saw one of them looking out of their pit of despair into the rest of the gym, at the late-sixties, bald, chunky guy lifting weights and sweating like he was gonna die (i.e., me) there was a wave of contempt and quiet bemusement that swept across the room like that pyroclastic flow from Mt. Saint Helens forty-five years ago. Well, maybe not completely quiet. I know that I heard one woman snort in derision as she looked at me and then instinctively flipped her unnaturally blonde hair over her ear and looked away.

Being sore and having trouble moving around after a tough workout may suck, but it beats ennui!!

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Filed under Farce, Health, Paul

Rain Freckles

I wasn’t expecting rain today at all. No clue that it was in the forecast. So when it started, I double checked. It wasn’t in the forecast!

My first clue that there was weather in the area was the thunder and lightning showing up in the Friends of Big Bear Valley video feed. Outside, seventy miles away, it was moving in.

A few minutes later, the rain started here. It was a desert rain, HUGE drops hitting hard, but not a lot of them.

It was also really dry, extremely low humidity, so the drops hit and evaporated almost immediately, leaving the “rain freckles” effect for quite a while before it actually looked wet.

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Filed under Photography, Weather

A Calm Pool

Some days you have certain priorities and the world has others.

I remain a clam pool amid the chaos, despite the fact that my to-do list didn’t shrink nearly as much as I had hoped for today.

Is there a nice old picture I can share, just as a break from the doom scrolling and endless stream of numbers?

Something I saw online said something like “Take two Bufferin capsules with a cup of Sanka and a glass of Tang and you’ll wake up in 1974 in the back seat of a Buick LeSabre.” I would take that deal, I would love to be back in 1974 and at Center Pond (shown) for a day or two with some dear friends who are no longer with us.

Instead, there’s a yet longer to-do list waiting for tomorrow.

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Filed under Paul, Photography, Travel

June 2025

It feels like I’m on a roller coaster at the top of the first lift hill – you know, that moment where it pauses for a second and lets you look over the edge, and while you’re not accelerating downward just yet, you know it’s coming, coming soon, and there’s absolutely nothing you can do to stop it?

May was like a month of setting up a huge set of dominos. Big picture, from an impartial, outside view, most of these upcoming adventures are good things. The search for the Forever Home. Starting to pack and think about the logistics of moving one final time. The annual audit at work. A bunch of other projects at work. Making some deliberate changes to my daily routines and habits (exercise, a trainer, more discipline in self care) to deal with some of the aging and stress issues. Mostly good, just change, and change is always stressful, even when (or perhaps “especially when”) it’s necessary and desireable.

Maybe it’s more like standing in the doorway of an airplane, waiting to do your first jump. You know that you want to do it, you know that it’s going to be a good thing, but it’s still terrifying.

It’s sure looking a lot like after months and months of prep and setting the stage, June is going to be when all of those dominos start to fall, when the roller coaster dives into its first loop, and when I really, really need to see if all of that planning and prep pays off and the parachute opens.

Exciting.

Exhausting.

Terrifying.

So here’s a picture of the DWP building and sunset from the Music Center last night.

As for Robert O’Hara’s new vision of “Hamlet” from yesterday? Someone who’s much more of a student of Shakespeare will need to weigh in. I’m just going to sit here and mutter “WT actual F??!!” over and over a lot.

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Filed under Forever Home, Paul, Photography

Some Whacked Out Danish Prince Dude

Our final performance at the Mark Taper Forum this year (one more at the Ahmanson next month):

To recap, “Green Day’s American Idiot” was wonderful and “Fake It Until You Make It” was…not.

This is a “bold new reimagining” and so on, but Gina Torres is in it as Gertrude, so I’m along for the ride. “Depictions of blood and violence, themes of suicide, substance abuse, strong language, simulated sex acts, and nudity.” What’s not to love?!

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Filed under Entertainment, Los Angeles, Photography